Bullying behavior is one of the common situations in the school. Bullying is usually considered as the part of growing up. However, it is primarily an early kind of violent behavior and aggressiveness. In fact, some statistic shows that four out of ten children who bully might have criminal record before they reach 30 years old.
Bullies usually cause serious problems that families, neighbors and school ignore. Some of the common behaviors of bullies are threatening, insulting, kicking, shoving, teasing at the bus, taking the child’s money or lunch. Anxiety and fear are some of the common effects of bullying in the children. In some case, victim tends to carry protection and even commit more aggressive activity.
A Word About the Victim
Even though everyone could be the target of this behavior, the victim usually singled out for the reason of the child’s psychological traits more than their physical traits. A typical victim of bullying is likely to be sensitive, shy, insecure or anxious. Additionally, some children are being bullied because of their physical features like being physically small, overweight or have a disability or they belong to a certain faith or religion, which makes them differ from others.
A Word About the Bully
Some of the traits of bullies are expressive, active, aggressive and outgoing. In order for them to express themselves they will openly harass a child that is weak in personality. This type of bully tends to refuse rules and regulations. By this way they can achieve a certain feeling of security and superiority. Other types of bullies are manipulative and more reserved. It means they don’t want to be known as tormentors or harassers. By this they tend to manipulate a person without its knowing. They can do these by discretely pretending, manipulating and cunning.
Even though there are two types of bullies in general most bullies have common characteristics and these are the following:
- they are more apprehensive regarding their own pleasure
- wants to have power over someone
- willing to abuse and use others in order for them to get they want
- may feel pain inside, maybe for their individual shortcomings
- they don’t entertain other people’s perspective, they just want theirs
What You Can Do
- As much as possible talk and listen to your children. It would be nice to encourage them to discuss about social events, school, their classmates and others. Walk or ride with them to and from the school in order for you to recognize or identify any problem that they may have.
- When your child is complaining about bullying, don’t ignore it instead listen to so that you can address the problem to the school. As you know some children are ashamed or afraid to discuss it to somebody, so when they complain pay attention to it.
- Observe for any symptoms that they might be a bullying victim, like asking extra supplies or money, tom clothes, sudden drop of grades and withdrawal.
- If you think that your child is a victim of bullies, tell the school or a certain organization that can help you monitor your children and ensuring their safety as well.
- Coordinate with other parents in the school, so that you can ensure that all the children in the neighborhood are watched closely to and from their school.
- As parents, you must not bully your kids whether it is physical or verbal abuse. You can use nonphysical discipline by explaining to them their faults or mistake, instead of yelling, ridiculing or ignoring them when they are not acting appropriately.
- Encourage your children to learn social skills, so that they can make friends. A resourceful, confident and with friends are not prone to be bullied or bully other as well.
- When they did something good to others, praise them. Let them know that it is good to be kind to others than being bad.
- Teach your children some ways to solve arguments without aggressive actions and words. You can also help them protect themselves like teach them how to walk confidently and be vigilant with their environment and know how to stand up and reason out.
- When having a bonding together such as going to movie or park, playing games, reading aloud or watching TV, you can also offer opportunities for you to have a conversation regarding bullying.
- Identify that bullies do this actions because of the feeling of loneliness, anger or insecurity. In the event that your child is a bully, seek immediate help from the school, organization or child psychologist.